Do Not Mix Blendz in the Toilet-San Jose, CA

Blendz was a pretty good place to stop by for a smoothie, salad or sandwich with their fresh atmosphere, but was the bathroom leafy green?

Many places in downtown require you to ask for a key, Blendz was no different and I really hate it, so one point down on them already before I even go inside.


The inside was nice, white, bright green and purple paint, tacky fake flowers, a very dark brown table, vegetable pictures on the walls.  Only the plant and table were out of place, so not so bad in design.

It was also very clean.  Maybe this is the benefit for having to ask for a key, I'm not finding heroine spoons on the sink, so it may tick me off asking for a key, but there was one obvious benefit.

Everything was authentically nice, everything was full, there was the toilet brush staring at me, but all in all Blendz was a good place to go.

8.5/10

Attack of the "The Kraken"-Cardiff, CA

Visiting a bar bathroom can be risky business and The Kraken doesn't disappoint.

There was some character in the bathroom: including a urine like smell, layers of graffiti for a good time, piles of air fresheners, broken stalls and the wonderful cheap to clean red tile.

The mix of urine and Palms of Paradise air disks stacked on top of a narrow ledge above the sink made my nose twitch and itch. Just a suggestion, cleaning can also help with smell.

Of course the stall I was in was broken and I held the door.  Uncomfortable to say the least, I couldn't enjoy the games on my iPhone, but there was writing on the wall.

I loved how the writing on the stalls was dated and initialed like school yearbook blurbs.  These secret messages were for the regulars, a primitive message board still in use today.

I felt nasty going in to the barley maintained toilet hole and left wanting to take a shower.  I almost saw the germs crawling on the walls clinging to the toilet paper.  This was a place to piss, leave and drink some more drinks.

The only redeeming quality about this place was their awesome BBQ.  It was so good, but if you have to pee, better go across the street to the restaurant, better to risk the unknown at this point.

3/10 only because it wasn't a hold in a ground with poison ivy for toilet paper.

Goldfish Point Cafe-La Jolla, CA

 I was on vacation with my boyfriend in San Diego and we decided to go down to La Jolla.  While there we visited the Goldfish Point Cafe where we got a coffee and took a stop at the porecelain throne.

Inside it was rather sad because it featured hardly any personality for a cute name like Goldfish.

The red tile was a cheap kitchen tile featured almost in every resturantes back kitchen.

It wasn't really clean, no pursehook and it was a little cold.

I was hoping for decorations to feel like a fishbowl with cool colors and personality.  This bathroom featured none but a place to go and move on.

Goldfish Cafe was a place for a decent coffee, but its bathroom was an eyesore compared to the rest of La Jolla.

I think it was disappointing for the owner not to take advantage of such a creative name and only going half way with it.

Perhaps it would be best for this bathroom to be for employees only.

6/10

The Counter-San Jose, Ca

The Counter was a modern 50s hamburger joint, with overpriced food and boring bathroom.

Santana Row was supposed to be a hip-happening place filled with drunken idiots on Friday night and The Counter a place to munch on a food fit for the munchies.

The place itself felt like a place from The Jetsons cartoon without the space-spandex outfits.

Sadly the design leaves little in the memory banks and the large TVs just take away from the atmosphere.

In the bathroom it featured a large hanging white globe in the bluish white tile and painted space.  The space was very soothing, simple, but features little atmosphere other than the music to cover up toilet flushes.

Everything was clean, but the toilet paper was thin as Bible pages, one of the handles on the locks was missing, no purse hooks,  one of the seat cover dispensers was empty, there was toilet paper rolls on top of the paper towel dispensers, the toilet brush was visually obvious and the trashcan was full.

The most interesting parts in the bathroom was the hexagon tile floors, thank goodness everybody has i-Phones to keep them busy on the pot.

Overpriced burgers, with an unsure design and blase design; The Counter was just a clean toilet in a forgettable space.  6.5/10

Big Basin Cafe-Saratoga, CA

I was chilling with my friend in downtown Saratoga, you know, where the richer than Los Gatos people live?  There was this little coffee shop and I really had to pee so I went in and my friend ordered a coffee.

It was a small bathroom; warm, well lit, nice air freshner smell and it featured calm colors.

Everything was also full, but the plunger was viiable, the toilet paper was on the toilet and there was some paper towles on the floor by the trashcan.


There was also a chair in front of the toilet just in case somebody wants to watch you go.  A little creepy for my taste, but I try not to judge.

It was an average clean bathroom, boring is ok I guess especially when it is a bathroom, because who wants ropes and pepto bismol pink?

Small but charming, 8/10 for me if you just need a clean place to pee.

Petco-San Jose, CA

Petco, where the pets go!  That's why they have oops bags.

Yes I shop at Petco occasionally because sometimes Target fails to have what I need, namely specialty items like decent cat food.

I volunteered at this Petco for Town Cats a while back and now the Humane Society is there, sad because Town Cats is a no kill rescue 100%, while the Humane Society will send unwanted animals away to be euthanized by another shelter so they say they are a "open door" shelter.

When I was there I used the bathroom many times, this time the bathroom featured a dark atmosphere, no purse hooks, a dirty sink and much more.

Retail sucks, I know this and anyone who has worked it knows it, but it doesn't mean  you leave your bathroom a mess.

I can't understand an employee who will go into the bathroom and not clean it up, especially if she isn't on break.

There were no seat covers, the trash was full and it just felt dirty to sit down in.

The sink was the worst wet mess, there were tacky fake, dusty, plastic plants to show off the bad filtration system and no soap to wash my hands.

Honestly, the store was not busy and regardless of how many signs are up stating "If the bathroom needs attention alert the management  :)" who informs the employees anything less than a diarrhea apocalypse?

It felt genuinely creepy and sad, because employees have to go here too, showing the lack of respect they have for their one private place.

5/10

Tropicana Buffet-San Jose, CA

The Tropicana Buffet was a place filled with loud families, running children and piles of food, so their bathrooms have their work cut out for them

It was a small two stall bathroom with one light barley glowing.

I opened the stall door and saw a trash can for all the personal feminine items and diapers, lots of diapers.  But this wasn't just a normal trash can, it was record for every previous woman who was on her cycle before me.

It did not matter if the toilet was clean, the tp was full, even if the seat covers were not stocked, I wanted to throw up in the bucket, so gross.

Washing my hands wasn't a joy either, the counter was very wet from child after child, unsupervised by a parent, came in and decided to play sink water wars.

Even drying my hands was a hap hazardous adventure because of the rubber-band jerry rigging invented by a redneck third cousin.

Like everywhere else in the restaurant business, it was understaffed and all of the people are overworked and underpaid, no wonder the bathrooms were the last item on the cleaning or fix-it list.  5/10 was the best I could muster, especially because of the bucket trash can lying in wait.

Sa-By Thai Cuisine-San Jose, CA

While babysitting for my friends cats while they went away for over two months they recommended Sa-By Thai, the food was delicious and their bathroom was comically decorated.

It was a rather large bathroom, a little dark, but the colors were lively and in touch with the Thai feel.

However, compared to the rest of the restaurant it was substantially less classy.

All the decorations looked like they were from a hoarders garage sale and falling off the walls.

To embed the ghettoness, notes on construction paper, were posted informing the pubic about how to flush a toilet and how to turn off a light.

I'm sure many individuals forget to have any sense of common courtesy for the next patron, but leaving poorly written and fading notes on your already shabbily painted walls is just bad customer management.

To stop this annoying waste of paper please join me in flushing twice if need be and turning off the light to save some much needed energy.  This will not only help the planet, but help the management focus on important issues, like toilet paper levels.

Yes the paper was stocked, the soap full and it was clean, accept for the dust covered plants, but it was sad to see how nice the rest of the place was compared to this small room.  It would not take much effort repaint, repair and re-design to help match the class just outside the door.

6/10

Safeway: Braving the Men's Room-Campbell, CA

The cliche happened; a long line at the woman's room at Safeway and the men's sat empty.  I decided to open the door and go with a terrified look on the other woman's faces.

I never understood why women fear the men's room, maybe it's the fact men can whip out their urination device, because pee just sprays everywhere because men obviously have no control over their second head.

Yes, there were times where men accidentally sprayed the floor, but urine is very sterile from a healthy human being and the seat was up at the time to avoid splatter on the top seat, so women just sit on the seat, with a cover if you want, and pee.

This bathroom had a basic design and a nice color of tannish-brown read on most of the walls and floor.

An industrial trashcan stood by under the air dryer ready for any heavy duty trash leaking out of a man's pockets.

I laughed at the soap dispenser teetering on the metal bars, no official dispenser was to be seen, it broke I guess and the creativity of placement was amusing.


And there stood the toilet, seat up, clean and proud, not any different from the women's next door.

There was a little but of a urine odor, but it wasn't overpowering and the toilet brush hiding between the sink pipes, it was fine ladies, just fine.

I even left the toilet seat up when I left.

7/10

Panera Bread-San Jose, CA

With its warm atmosphere, fresh baked goods and food Panera Bread was a great place to sit down and eat with friends and family, but how do their bathrooms compare?

The bathroom had a cheery paint job, automatic paper towel dispenser and water faucet, the toilet was push flush and there were cute wooden hooks on the bathroom walls.

It was a two stall restroom, both work, but the handicap stall toilet was not flushed.

Also, the floor was a little dirty and the bathroom was so cold.

Bad elevator music was playing, bouncing off the tile, irritating my ears with repetitive mellow tones.

It was an okay visit, but nothing stands out here, everything was safe and standard.

I'm not saying this bathroom needed to be a strange alien world or so uniquely different it blew my mind, it was functional, but I wish there was a personal flare instread of a boxcutter image made for everyother Panera Bread.

Bathrooms should be a sanctuary, especially whith the buisness being done.  This one attempted it, but it was too cold, literally, and empty of personality to reach any emotion for me.

Sad, just another average restroom, full of average design and music.  7.5/10

Barnes and Noble-San Jose, CA

Barnes and Noble usually has a decent restroom, but there were times it was left to be an unholy mess.  Let see if it was true for this toilet spelunker.

Upon entering it was a well lit 3 stall layout with a classic white and green tile design most Barnes and Noble bathrooms have.  

The tile did not look too grimy and all the doors worked, were equipped with purse hooks and loaded with toilet paper and seat covers.

Temperature wise, it was a little chilly, but not to the point were my buttocks produced goosebumps when exposed.

I hate the cheap toilet paper many major big-box companies use in their stores though.  It's thin and scratchy, making the cleaning process a long and painful one.  

I would think using better paper would lower a company's cost because people would use less, but what do I know about money?  I just my by butt to be in comfort.

In the stall I chose there was a sticker from a shirt stuck to the wall.

OK, how lazy do you have to be to not throw away a piece of trash in the bathroom of all places?  That was just the laziest litterbug right there, in the stall before me.

Enjoy that t-shirt made by a child starving to death in Bangladesh and leave your trash stuck to the wall while your at it for somebody else to clean up and don't forget to recycle.

To quell my litterbug fury,  both the soap, the paper towels were full and the sink was clean.

Overall the Barnes and Noble bathrooms were a good stop to make.  Clean, well lit and well stocked, there was little to fear.  9/10

New India Chaat Cafe-San Jose, CA

New India Chaat Cafe had the best Indian food I've ever tasted, but this wasn't about the phonomonal food, it was about the porcelain throne.

I'm holding off on the picture for a moment to explain how overwheling the bathroom was.  Not because it was litered with toilet paper, covered in the smell of fecal matter, dripping with soap puddles, no, in fact it was pretty clean.

The smell was tolerable, again no purse hook, the light was bright, but since the colors were not some steirl white the floresent litghting wasn't too horrible.

In fact the design of the bathroom was so surprisingly unique I burst out laughing.

Just look at it.

Why are there ropes?

I saw a kinky woman riding on them as I sat down just to marvel at the design thoughts of the owner.

"Ropes, like a curtain, kinky no?"

My thoughts, "No, not really."  I just saw a bunch of germs clinging to them from the leaping butt matter esaping the toilet and small children hanging on them like big rats.  Nothing appealing in the image.

And look at the pink.

No definition on any of the patterns, just pink, peto bismol on the walls, perfect if you had an upset stomach from the spicy food I guess.

What was the point of cutting out designs, slapping them on the walls and painting them the same color as the wall?

The obscene design stands out the most.  Everything else is fine, but the pink and the ropes border on the funny-weird.

For the verdict: the ropes blared unsanitary, but amused me like the pink on pink wall design.  Just because this was a very unique bathroom and it amused me so much I thought a 8/10 would be nice, even if the floor was a little dirty and the room a little chill.

Holder's Country Inn-San Jose, Ca

When have gone to Holder's Inn with my family for my whole life and the food, great American fair, but were the bathrooms up to par?

Since this was a muti-stall bathroom I only minus half a point for each offence because these bathrooms were designed to hold more people and leeway was warranted for this fact.

The design of the bathroom reached out from the 70s, but it was not in a good way, even though the pink tile and worn pink counter top still works doesn't mean it doesn't make a modern woman's eye twitch.

Some toilet paper was littering the floor, the cover seats were out and the tile was grimy.

They probably do not clean unless necessary and the end of the day, but it still looks gross.

Thankfully both stalls locked, that was a rarity, and finally somebody thought purse hooks were a good idea, because it wouldn't be good business to piss off all those old granny's coming by to munch on some pancakes without need for their dentures.

Also, there was some awesome reading material if you forgot your smartphone.  But it was hard to read in the light.

Don't see much of the bathroom stall advertising anymore actually.

It was a little cold in there too and I really hate the paper towel roll just sitting on the counter, getting wet and gross.  Ew.

Items like paper towels and toilet paper should not be left out in the bathroom because it was just gross to think about the wet paper clinging to my fingers and butt.

Overall, Holder's Inn was an average booty stop at 7.5/10 for a multi-stall bathroom.